be not ashamed.

Honest moment, internet. Bear with me. I used to be embarrassed by my passion for photography. Embarrassed that all I wanted to do all day was walk around with a camera switching lenses, adjusting settings, finding delicious, perfect natural light and taking pictures. Photography didn't (and still doesn't) feel like work and I felt like I should be doing something that felt like work. (Please don't ask me where I got such a silly idea.)

I went to a private elementary school and High School, a private college, got a BA from a great university, I'm fairly book smart and I'm skilled at a lot of things. For a time I wanted to be an attorney, an FBI agent, a forensic anthropologist and even a meteorologist. Those weren't just the crazy dreams of a 7 year old girl whose parents always told her she could do everything and anything she wanted. Those were things I was interested in, passionate about and excited about. Except.... they weren't (aren't) photography. Sure - getting a Law Degree is prestigious and all kinds of awesome, but have you seen the new Nikon prime that just came out?? See - that's my point. Whenever my brain goes to one place, somehow it always finds its way back to photography.

I read once that you don't decide to do crazy things like quit a great job in New York City and move to the other side of the country because you want to. You do them because you have to. (Just like I had to go to NYC for college. My entire being was screaming that that was the place I needed to be!) You go because the creative spirits and guides in your head that were once just soft whispers are now asking, no, demanding that you stop delaying what is surely the inevitable and just start doing what you love already. How many of us are in jobs we don't love, in cities we don't love, surrounded by people who aren't supportive or maybe family that wants to dictate our futures for their own peace of mind? I think perhaps too many.

Eventually I got to a place where I had to make a decision. Ignore my passion to do other worthy things that I was good at but not in love with? Or just leap and hope that a net would appear? I decided to leap.

Sure I don't have any gigs right now, and I'm not a perfect photographer. I don't know if I'll ever be. And I'm okay with that. But I still leapt. I swan dived right into my goals and dreams hoping that they will be enough. And I made a decision to not be ashamed of my dreams.  I won't make fun of yours if you won't make fun of mine, okay?

and your photo treat for the day. I took another trip into downtown with my camera last week. This time a little before sunrise. The clouds were absolutely gorgeous! This is one of my favorites. :)

 

Headshot Session: Stephanie G. (chin up!)

Last Saturday I spent a few hours with the very lovely and energetic Stephanie G.. Vivacious, talented, full of energy and those green eyes.... Yes! (It’s always tortured me that my own eyes are plain ol’ brown – I love clients with eyes full of color that soak in the sun!).

Steph brought along her guitar for a few of the shots and they were my far my favorite ones from the day. Possibly the most wonderful thing about my time with Steph was working with someone who so very clearly knew the ‘looks’ she wanted for the shoot. As soon as I held that camera up, she was on point and ready (but I did set the record for number of times saying “chin up!” lol). We had some ominous cloudy weather that afternoon, but the light ended up being wonderful and we had a lot of fun on the shoot. 

 

Headshots: Ashley B. (and the shoot that almost wasn't)

The scene before this shoot: me, sitting at my kitchen table, head down, shaking with a fever and sweating bullets. the reason: sick, sick, sick.

I dedicate this entry to the healing powers of Theraflu Daytime Cold & Cough, for which this shoot would not have been possible. Oh, and of course the healing powers of soup. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

I rarely get sick, but when I do, its like I've won the sick lottery. I get everything. under. the. sun. Sore throat? check. Ear infection? check. Watery eyes? check. Upper Respiratory Infection? check. Sinusitis? check check. (I'll spare you the rest of my suffering). 2 hours before my shoot with Ashley, all these things hit me in the face. Uh oh. (there is a happy ending to this tale.)

After taking so many OTC meds it would make a doctor blush, I was off to the shoot. Chugging water and hot tea, I was trying everything I could to just make it through these few hours.

By the time I met Ashley, I was feeling soooo much better, thank God. On top of that good news, I was so incredibly blessed to have gotten Ashley for this particular shoot when my energy levels were way down. She was an absolute natural in front of the camera and made my job so much easier! And the girl has no bad angles. None at all. Don't exist. Amazing! She brought so much light and energy into every shot.... I was so so so spoiled with her! (Sorry, Ashley, for gushing about you the entire shoot and now into this blog! But, umm hello, the world must know how fantastic you are!)

And now introducing the radiant, gorgeous, hilarious, sassy, and talented Ashley B.! Seriously, watch out for this one... it's only a matter of time before she makes it big time.

Headshots: Brian M. (with a twinkle in his eye)

The oh so wonderful Brian M. has been a friend of mine for almost 3 years and every time I see him I love him a little more. Who could blame me either - wait till you see those green eyes!

Due to the general hectic-ness of our lives, we had a "half" shoot last summer, and there were high hopes for meeting soon after to finish up, but the reality of our schedules made this impossible. So when he and I finally had some time open on the same day at the same time, we jumped on the chance to finish what we had started last year. And wouldn't you know... as I was on my way to our meeting spot it started to rain! Aaaahh!!

Ten minutes and a few choice curses later... the sun came out. Never a dull day, folks.

For this shoot we hit up my usual fave Soho location, then opted for moving a bit north into Chelsea where the lighting and locations proved to be absolutely delicious! We conquered dehydration, drunks, crazies(!!) and changing in public and it was so worth it! And I got that twinkle in your eye, huh B? ;)

And now introducing the always wonderful, forever hilarious and insanely talented, Brian M.!

ps. check back Thursday or Friday for some gorgeous shots of the smart, sassy, hilarious and beautiful Emily G.!

Heather G.: Headshots and Haircuts.

I shot with the very adorable Heather almost exactly a year ago from our most recent shoot. She was new to New York, and excited for a new adventure. I couldn't help but be a little fearful that she was so excited to be living in a city that has a tendency to beat you down a little. I decided not to mention it and let the growth that happens when you live here happen organically to her as it had happened to me. I knew she would go far and use that powerful smile of hers to put up some good fights. Oh, and of course we had an amazing amount of fun on that first shoot.

One year later we met again. Heather had gotten a new haircut that was drastic enough to warrant needing new shots. I was so happy to be the one she called! One of the biggest compliments I can ever get is being asked to work with someone again. This means they liked me and their pictures enough the first time that they only wanted to work with me again. Milka what?? I am absolutely honored when this happens! So we met in Soho, my current favorite place to shoot, and got going. As the conversation went on I knew that she had grown tremendously in that year. While still in love with New York, she had experienced how trying life here can be – she was still wearing that smile though! "Ah yes, I have so been there", I said to her.

Which brings me to a quick point... I applaud anyone who has come to this city as a transplant and made it in any capacity whatsoever. You won a battle by doing so. I mean that literally - a battle was fought, and you came out the winner. Living here is hard and it tests tremendously. There are days you are forced to stop and think, "why am I putting myself through this?". But if you stay another day, another week, another month or year, and let yourself grow a little more and be tested a little more - the changes you see in yourself are well worth the fight. Phew... I digress...

And now introducing (for a second time), the very fab Heather G.!

Adrianne + James: New York Engagement Shoot

I couldn't have wished for a more fabulous pair to work with on the (very) hot June day our shoot was scheduled for. It was one of those humid new york days they don't tell you about in travel books. Where the air feels so thick with heat you're unsure if you're gonna be able to make it two blocks without needing to stop and rest. Adrianne and James battled the heat bravely, smile on their faces the whole time. Their energy was incredible and their happiness contagious! James was full of ideas for our next great shot, excitingly helping us move along through lower manhattan and then to brooklyn where we ended the day (I really did love all your ideas, James!). The shots are so exciting and as young and hip as these two are.

I had an amazing time hanging out and being crazy around new york with you guys and feel so honored to have been able to help document your incredible love!

Here are a few of my favs...

Frances + Mario: New York Engagement Shoot

I've said it before, and I'll say it again - summer in New York is the most magical time! It brings out a spirit in people that you don't see any other time of the year. Frances and Mario were in the city from Colorado and during our shoot, I could feel them falling in love with the city! Their love and enjoyment of our locations and of each other was palpable and made for a fantastic few hours together! I wish them immense love and continued happiness with each other! And thank them both for all the fun!!

Enjoy!